Sanity

I feel like I am going insane.
I don't seem to be able to hold the threads of stable emotions with or without drugs.
I hurt the people I value.

I don't want to be in people's lives because I am too much of a mess and no one can support me and I hurt them with my expectations.

And even though I know this I can't change it.

So I want to sit in my cupboard, in the dark and touch no one.

Twas the day before Christmas

Santa's coming tonight.
Good luck to him, poor bugger.
It rained last night so with the 35 C day today I think that red suit is looking like a misery. And when he steps into my house, he is going to find his suffering added to.

On Thursday, something went wrong with Ponyo's tummy and the laundry was a complete disaster area after his night's sleep. Well, I cleaned it up, aired the house and decided that he is big enough now to be an outside dog.

So Friday night he barked a little, but Saturday night, with his Uncle Doug to share the yard with, he barked all night.

I needed sleep -desperately-so last night I did a deal with the little devil and let him sleep in the laundry again.

This morning Mum greeted me with the news that she thought he had been sick. Understatement. Every excretion a dog can make was made. The smell was profoundly bad. Even now, showered and at work I feel like I can still smell it.

I am guessing his diet of garden hoses, camellias, bark, tissues, and anything else he can get his teeth onto is catching up on his tummy.

But in any case, we have a very seriously funky smell going on in the house that a hot and sweaty Santa is not going to 'dig'.

Twas the night before Christmas

Well actually it was the weekend before my parents arrive for Christmas......

Not much time for a wordy story as I am now fighting the clock to get ready for Christmas. I am up at the crack of dawn blogging because that is the only time left.

I needed to get the garden to the next stage. I begged the kids to help. My shoulder has been a complete cow for months now. But despite unhelpful kids and shoulder, I was determined to get this done before mum and dad arrive for Christmas.

So I got up on Sunday morning and went flat out. And when I didn't finish, I got up Monday morning and did some more.

And when I didn't finish, I got home from a Christmas 'do' and worked some more.

And by then it was 10pm and too dark for photos ops.... hence the dawn blogging!

Now for the photos!
First the before and after progress collection.....

See... progress!

The front view

Really should shift the hose for the show off shots!